Been thinking about Ty’s marital situation after his “regret” statement, which slightly startled me. One of the chief unintended results marriage always manages to achieve seems to shut out alternative modes of living. It certainly suits many people, but the point is, that a singleton as singular as Ty could also get into the institutionalized love, shows this old institution offers something needed at an existential level by human lives.

I more have trouble with the narrowing down of life this sort of nuclear unit entails. So from now on it’s just “US”. The essential trade-off is between security and vitality. If the gift of life is precious enough, we’d fail ourselves and the world at large when we close ourselves off from experiences that have the potential to heighten our sense of being alive. Nothing could be more elemental and vital than a genuine erotic imperative.

Am actually not polyamorous by temperament (some people are, like Lessing, who said she was by nature promiscuous and liked “flitting from flower to flower” and “I cannot imagine myself not loving several people at once in various ways”). It’s more like I’m enamored with the notion of mental and emotional polygamy. Physically, I almost find I like to focus my lustful energies on one single person at a time. Spreading it around equals diluting pleasure. Although the duration varies.